Day 625: Joyous Fuck-up

Oooh, how delicious: tonight [Thursday], I done a talk at ImpactHub Kings Cross and it was ace. It was called Fuck-Up Nights and it's part of a thing that started in Mexico City where you talk to an audience about a failure you did. And I now know how much I love to talk to an audience, and how scared I am of failure, and how good it is for me to risk some. The routine is often very similar. Leave it a bit late. Have a structure but not many specifics. Shit it a bit. Get round to doing the first bit (in this case, putting the slides together) enjoy it hugely and then realise how much else there is to do.

It always comes together, partly because I love a good bit of pants-seating and I especially like things when they move over to questions. I am much more at ease with that bit. And I like talking to people and finding out what it is they're interested in. And I like watching faces in audiences. 

It was lovely to meet that Annick Rau, finally, who has been a figment on the Hub ether for a number of years, but who turns out, in fact, to be an actual person, and a fabulous one at that. 

She can manipulate soup. And sing!

And then I had a bit of a Ruth & Eddie feeding frenzy, which was lovely and playful and a bit like having a tasty, healthy snack for the soul (though it also involved filthy noodles). Theatre in Greenwich on Friday, and some comedy DLR take-out consumption (including Ruth's Outstanding Two-pot Soup Manipulation Technique TM) and then on Saturday, a chilled evening with Eddie's mum too and the blessed presence of Greg and Aristotle, some beauuuuuuuuutiful music (of course), lots of ease and laughing and brains and youtube, and a bit of fruit juice. 

Their voices are still with me, not only in my head now, but on their CD! Voices like birds flying around each other, dipping and soaring, dancing and sweetly preening. And Ruth solo singing: I never knew so much music could be contained in each note; I have heard angels breathe through her, and it's clear they love to do it. 

In between, a marvellous healing session with Natalya - bowed down with gratitude. It comes at a good time and it was lovely to see her. My ovaries are dancing. They're doing something, anyway, possibly Ceroc. It was a deep one. Thank you thank you.

Thanks, Greg, for a lovely gift - a charity shop mirror of perfect dimensions. I love it and the thing he said that made me cry. I'm a crier, me, and it was lovely too. Thank you, Macarena... you know things that can help me stop being such an easy weeper, maybe.

I have swum in that water every day and every day its healing richness gets richer, the dive is fruitfuller. Today was topped off with tea and toast and kumquat jam in the lifeguards' hut thanks to beautiful artist Jane, with whom I may dance on Tuesday. 
I've got a leaky henna patty on my head. I just thought you should know.