How nice it was to come home. Ruth had cooked a regal cauliflower cheese, complete with cheesy breadcrumb topping an secret bacon. All with steamed vegetables and potatoes and some delicious ginger drink. The meal was delicious and the company was too. It's feeling quite extreme, how much I'll miss her when I move. It's also feeling quite silly that I am about to move and then promptly be away for already a significant proportion of my time in there... but that's okay. We'll work it out. I still think it's the right thing to do. And there's one good way to find out.
Thank you for delicious, refreshing maté tea (below) and for two more boxes of it waiting in the health food shop. I am excited. Silly to be excited about loose leaf tea, but there it is. I am grateful, if a little full of trepidation, at the amount of work I need to get through this weekend. I'm glad of it, of course, but I'm going to need to be both organised (a step I fairly often acheive) and disciplined (often my downfall) to get all this done this weekend.
I am determined to have at least a tiny bit of time doing something else, and that lovely thing to do is to meet the lady Juliet Merridew tomorrow evening. So I have a whole stash of things to be done before that. And I HAVE to finish all of it tomorrow as I'm working all day Monday at The Hub. I am blessed to have such work all flowing in. I have to start to make choices - which work to focus on and which to drop. I am nearly there.
Thank you for a slightly earlier finish than expected, and that I liked Lauretta (newly met actor) so much. She has promised to send me a link to another yoga/meditation place. She was inspiring. Andy Snowball was hilarious again. Their corpsing nearly made me wee. I love it when laughter takes over like that, when it shakes you and just won't let go, even when nothing's really funny.
And isn't Lucy Davies good? She ran our rehearsals for two full days. She's lovely, funny and very skilled. When she was drifting into what to say as a trainer, I felt all small. She is so fluid and natural. I can't believe she doesn't do delivery any more. Everyone has to do what makes them thrive, and she is very good at design.
I'm so glad I made the opposite call, though. Even if, in my mind, she'd do the most brilliant job - I couldn't even touch it - I wouldn't have it the other way round for anything. I love being in the room and playing.
I'm excited about this job and its opportunities and challenges. I'm also pleased I did my write-up work on the train on the way home, while it was still fresh. Oh, I loved that gentle time alone, no pleasant conversation, no slightly tense listening, as I've been doing for the last two days. Though I enjoyed the conversation with Lauretta on the trip back from Paddington, and that with all the delays and changes too.
Oooh - I realise that maybe I haven't lived up to my promise of proper listening these last few days. I have spent a fair amount of time in my own head, playing, thinking, reflecting, hearing other voices. Perhaps I could have been more present. Pleasant?
Tomorrow, the pond - after four whole, resisty days off. I missed it so much today. I felt crusty-cloudy until about 3.30. Only then did my shoulders loosen a little bit, my neck free up. It's been so painful recently. I hope the bed change sorts it after a while, and more yoga, more yoga. Even more. I want to be really, truly flexible. A sun salutation? Could that be the way forward in the morning? It has a bit of everything, and that doesn't preclude a longer session later in the day.
Ruth has said she'll come with me to the pond tomorrow. Perhaps not to go in, but just to be there, to see people, to test the water (literally) and to see how she feels when faced with it. I am very pleased indeed about this. Next week - get this - the pond starts opening earlier, because even though it's still only January, and not even quite 21st, the light is coming back and the sunrise it presenting itself earlier.
This afternoon, while waiting for my train, I looked up to see rich pink clouds hanging translucent in azure blue skies as the light began to fade. It was a small corner of sky, between the platform roof and the bulk of the train itself, but oh, it was beautiful. I am looking forward to being physically in nature tomorrow - within the water, all covered and wrapped up. Yes please. Yes please. Yes please.
No reason for the peacock. I found it and it was pretty. And it reminds me of Esther Lilley (www.peacocktreeyoga.com), which is ALWAYS a good thing.
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