Day 10: Non-Blog Blog and Mermaids

This one looks a bit like a bed

This is not a blog. This is an afterthought. A beforethought. A beforebedthought. It's late, I'm tired and tomorrow I'm up early to do all the things before a river swim at 8.30 and a visit to a new place at 10.15 (better get my shit on after the frozen swim). There's been frost every morning for a good few days. It will be a shock to the system. I'm excited. 

I've spent a lot of the day writing a job application for a job I really want. I really, really do want it, so much so that it freaks me out. I've been freelance for more than eight years, but this job would trump the lot (lower case, people). 

This looks a bit like my belly.

So I'm applying. I'll do my best, I'll send the application and I'll let go of the outcome further than that (I want the fucker, ok!). I'm a sucker for an interview, though, so if nothing else, I hope I get that. 

And whatever happens, there it is, I've outed myself. I really really want something - specifically, I want to be able to say that I am the director of the Ministry of Stories.* Not for the sake of saying it (though it does have a ring to it) but because I believe in what they do, I think I could do the job well and I'd be proud to be involved with them. 

This looks ridiculous, and quite pleasing

So I wiggle in gratitude to the courage to put myself out there, to want something publicly and to risk ridicule from my imaginary jury if I don't get it. And for doing a blog despite doing crazy-eye. And for my bed, who is singing my name like sirens sing to sailors. I'm on my way. 

* I was desperate not to say that, because that really IS putting it out there, but that's kind of the point.