Grateful: Day 57

Ruth and her lovely face, and humour, and things to say to each other after a few days away. The fact that, despite a cold, she seems back on Ruthish form. And it's just nice to see her.A lift to the airport - brilliant - and a safe and comfortable flight, a coach caught, then a bus.

A fabulous, striking Eastern European woman with dark hair and eyes, who stalked up to me in the coach queue and said, in a strident, heavily-accented voice: "Tell me one thing: where are you going?". It made me laugh and laugh. We told her we were going into London. Her and her boyfriend had missed their coach but they came back and caught ou

rs. She stalked onto the bus and sat down behind us.

Kate, her gentleness and wisdom, her lovely face as well, her intelligence. And an impromptu knitting lesson on the coach. Good company,

Lessons, intentions and hospitality from Margaret and from Peter, in all kinds of languages. Views to die for, out across Cologne. Rich seeded bread too, and quark - what a revelation! I haven't had quark for years, since my cafe job on Norderney, where 'Eis und Heiß' were off the menu at 10pm so we could start to clean, and the landlord would get the punters out at 10.30 by playing 'Feierabend!' - a very cheesy song that means 'it's the end of the day and time to go home' only sung all jolly. It's the audio equivalent of a smiley at the end of a 'polite notice' on the fridge of cafe society (note to The Semark there).

A moon of striking beauty and fullness, with its aurora in the cold. From the top of St. James's Lane, I saw an aeroplane trail streak up next to it. Fireworks down the hill, in 'proper London'. Little honours for the eyes.

A late call with Esther Lilley. Human, funny, full of tiredness and bubbles at the same time, and still overflowing with wisdom and laughter. Oh, I am glad of her. She's a teacher and a half, in teacher mode and in friend mode. She is generous and grounded. She has angels in her and diligent little house-elves too. Thank you for words and presence and yoga inspiration.

I struggled with myself this morning - not physically, but it might as well have been. All wrenchy and fraught. It's good to know that even in those times, there are so many good things. Bugger - I forgot the teeth. I said that next time I was having one of those moments, I'd put in my teeth and see if they still made me laugh, but I forgot. I don't wish upon myself another such moment any sooner than it needs to be. If another one comes, though, I hope the teeth will pop back into my mind so I can put them in my mouth.

Thank you for honey and lemon, a shower, and a bed, a room pre-warmed, and the prospect of cold water to bring me to my senses in the morning. There's a ritual worth doing, a thing worth worshipping. Here's to the pond.