Grateful: Day 76 - New Year's Eve Eve

Today, I am surrounded by couples kissing. I'm sure it's a good sign, though sometimes it feels a little bit not. I have a very sweet couple right in front of me right now who can't bear to be apart. The boy has brought his chair around so he can sit next to the (very beautiful) girl he is with and periodically bury his face in her neck.

To my left a shaven-headed man has just kissed the hand of his bob-haired girlfriend before placing it on his scalp for an enforced - but seemingly well-received - nuzzle. That's all. Not surrounded, then, but they stand out. You know.

I recognise my flickers of irritation as jealousy, or at least as a kind of wistful yearning. It's all good. I'm grateful for that development. When it's just the irritation and I'm not able to see any other levels, it's really very annoying indeed. And it's not a 'get a room' situation. They are displaying, in my view, very appropriate levels of affection. It's sweet. Oh, shut up and have another nectarine.

I am excited. I get to see Victoria Sandison this evening. Very good news indeed. I'm off there now. Not really much point going home. I've sat here and worked for five hours. While I haven't achieved as much as I would have liked to, I'm now more than ready to move.

I've had lovely emails and posts from many fabulous people today, and over the last days, weeks and months. I feel very lucky that most of the people I come into contact with behave beautifully.

Ruth has gone to Wales to see in the New Year in a mountain cottage. I'm going to go and meditate with yoga people tomorrow night. I'll take it as it comes. I'll see how it is. I'll listen. I like that I have a thing to do that speaks to me.

This morning: birds. So many birds. Shouty, slender gulls. The ducks were quiet, but very present. Lots of them huddling. Moorhens. Pigeons. Magpies. Parakeets. A flock of something overhead as I swam round. Take flight. Take flight. I think my day of goals yesterday has made me giddy. No harm in that.

I think my body is finally back to its full tolerance. It's happy with the cold. It's not complaining anywhere near as much, even though the temperature is dropping again. Maybe it was warmed by seeing Mary. Mary Politics. Mary Bike. There are so many Marys. I like this one very much and I haven't seen her since the end of November, though she's been coming. It was very nice to see her back again.

And a strong, hot shower*. I've been used to having a cold one for a week now, and finding it warmer than the pond, so that's all good. But ooh, it was nice to have a proper blast of fast, hot water streaming over me. Small, simple pleasures. The best kind. Welcomed. Appreciated. Blessed.

* Goodness, that image search threw up more porn than I've seen in a very long time. Goodness me. Nearly as much as the time I typed the words 'Southern Europe' into an online translation programme at Hasbro a few years ago, and saw images more graphic than anything before or since. What a specific virus!